Moody on UFO, Mangalyaan and Moon Mission for monkey baat (satire)

Moody had made a name for himself in a number of areas that had never been charted by any other political leader – one was his passion for selfies, another was his passion for coining new phrases and the third was his passion for talking. He was the most popular leader and, if and when, an Extra Terrestrial landed from outer Space, it would be sure to look him up.
Suddenly, the phone on his desk rang.
‘Yes, Moody here,’ he picked up the receiver and said.
There was a lot of crackling noise in the line followed by a continuous shrill blast of a whistle and then a voice came over.

‘Am I speaking to the most popular man on Earth?’ the voice asked.
‘Of course I am the most popular man on Earth,’ Moody replied.
‘And the man who loves selfies?’
‘Yes, undoubtedly. I set the trend and other leaders are following.’
‘And, the man who has travelled to all the countries in the world.’
‘Yes again,’ Moody was getting irritated. ‘But, who are you? I don’t recollect meeting you.’
‘You are right. We have not met yet.’
‘How did you get my number?’ Moody panicked. ‘Only a few top leaders of the world have access to my number.’
‘I am an alien, I don’t come under the control of any Earthling. I have my own UFO and can travel at will wherever I want to go. Do you want to meet me?’
Moody was amused. If an alien did come to meet him, it would be a unique experience.
‘OK Mr. Alien, please do make your entry,’ he said.
He was an orator par excellence and loved to hear his own voice. That is how monkey baat, the monthly radio program, took off. However, the novelty soon wore off and Moody was worried about which topic to talk on to hold the attention of his audience.
He had his answer. He would talk about UFOs in his next monkey baat, UFO, Mangalyaan, and Moon Mission. They all begin with M, just like his own name. Such a session would draw the younger generation to the radio.
A discreet knock on the door brought him back to reality. (to be continued …)


Image courtesy wikimediacommons.org

Mars mission very much on the cards - six scientists are getting ready in Hawaii

Remembering Princess Diana on her 20th death anniversary

Restaurant offering only organic food opens in Jubilee Hills, Hyderabad


Didi to UP on a selling mission (satire)

Ronald Grump invites Moody to Las Vegas (satire)

In the wonderland of deo sprays, fairness creams, and condoms


Sets of the film Padmavati in Jaipur vandalised, Bhansali cancels shooting

Indian born actress Priyanka Bose talks about the movie 'Lion'

Pakistan government lifts the ban on Indian films with 'Raees' and 'Kaabil'


Fire in a mosque in Texas - the Islamic Center of Victoria badly damaged

ISIS had plans to launch chemical warfare - evidence unearthed in Mosul

26-year-old man mows down four people and injures another 25 in Melbourne CBD

Fuchka Festival in Kolkata and selfies (satire)

Didi was in top gear. She had won a battle and had returned land to the farmers. She had ousted an automobile manufacturing company from her land, had uprooted the buildings and had returned the land back to the farmers. It was a promise she had made and, she had fulfilled it.
‘I think this calls for a celebration,’ Patro Chatto said in a low voice. He had, of late, come closer to Didi and he loved to bask in her glory.
‘Let us arrange a festival,’ Didi said. ‘We have ilish festival and sandesh festival, let us organize another interesting festival that has universal appeal.’
‘We can go in for jhal muri festival,’ Dee Wreck suggested. ‘It is a unique product of Bengal and has taken London by storm. I have seen rave reviews in the social media. We can use the opportunity to woo the British to come to our city.’
‘That is a good idea,’ Fear Had said. ‘I know you also love jhal muri. The other day you were having jhal muri in front of Victoria Memorial with one of your guests and it became hot news. Just like the hot jhal muri.’ Didi gave Fear Had a hard look.
‘I have a better idea,’ Omit Misra cleared his throat. ‘It has a mass appeal because it is loved equally all over the country.’
‘What is it?’ Didi asked.

‘Fuchka,’ Omit Misra replied and wiped his glasses. ‘It is also known as the golguppa or pani puri. Whenever I get a chance, I have several mouthfuls.’
‘Not a bad idea,’ Didi was serious. ‘I’ll invite my friends from Delhi and Mumbai to set up stalls for variety.’ ‘What about the venue?’ Show Van asked.
‘The Milon Mela,’ Didi said. ‘That is where we hold all festivals.’
‘But – it is a huge area. Can it be filled?’
Didi grinned.
‘Don’t be silly,’ she chided him. ‘There will be stalls for selling fuchka and golguppas and pani puris. Then there will be a section on cookery where experts will come and talk about how to make fuchkas. And – there will be books on fuchkas. I will write one book of poems about fuchka. The possibilities are unlimited.’
‘When do we have this festival?’ Dee Wreck asked.
‘Get hold of the oldest fuchka man and his date of birth. That will be the date,’ Didi said. ‘He will probably be from Bihar. I will honor him on the occasion and my fans will increase. I will also declare a holiday on that date so that everyone can make a beeline for Milon Mela to enjoy fuchkas.’
‘There is one problem,’ Patro Chatto mumbled.
‘What?’ Didi asked.
‘Can you take selfie while gulping fuchkas?’ (to be continued …)


Image courtesy wikimediacommons.org


Some more interesting links -

Calcutta Tramways Company to increase frequency of tram service at night from November

Tampara wetland, a tourist spot in Ganjam district, to get a facelift

Durga idol of 2016 to be preserved in Park Street metro station


Moody becomes moody after surgical strike (satire)

Lord Shiva in the world of deodorants (satire)

Three cheers for Didi – the Jill of all trades (satire)


Terrorist attacks and suicide bombing kill at least 46 in Iraq

21 school girls of Chibok, abducted by Boko Haram in 2014, return home

Indications are there that both United States and Russia are preparing for war


Power Rangers to return after a decade and hit the screens on March 24 next year

Bob Dylan, the 75-year-old American folk singer, wins Nobel Prize for literature

Antonio Banderas gifted a pair of monkeys to Salma Hayek on her birthday

Lord Shiva’s Durga puja is about selfish people and selfies (satire)

Lord Shiva was totally relaxed. Durga had gone to her mother’s and the surroundings of Mount Kailash were calm and quiet. No sound of cooking came from the kitchen. Durga had, like a dutiful and loving Indian wife had cooked in advance and stocked the freezer with a variety of ready-to-eat dishes.
It was afternoon and Shiva was sitting in the shade of a tree after a dose of chillum when his smartphone rang. Durga was on the line.
‘Are you feeling lonely?’ he asked.
‘Not lonely but confused,’ Durga sighed.
‘Why?’
‘In one pandal, I am surrounded by broken bricks, in another pandal, it is sea shells, in a third it is coconuts. My devotees are exploiting me. To them, I have become a means to make money. There is no devotion.’

‘Don’t worry,’ Shiva consoled her. ‘It’s all for a good cause.’
‘How?’
‘This annual ritual surrounding your visit to your mother’s place has spawned a whole number of industries and generated thousands of jobs. It has reduced unemployment.’
‘I think your dose of ganja has gone to your head. You must be hallucinating.’
‘I am serious,’ Shiva said. ‘The annual puja that you are seeing is the result of a whole year’s effort by a group of people. And, these people are artists, artisans and think tanks. They are intellectuals and scour the internet to come up with revolutionary ideas to mint money.’
‘Don’t talk in riddles,’ Durga was irritated.
‘The brains behind these pujas work overtime to conjure up ways and means of making money. They select a design for the pandal and then sets the ball rolling. They have to generate enough employment potentials for their trusted followers to keep them happy.’
‘I really think you are stoned.’
‘No. I am absolutely sane. You must remember Rome was not built in a day.’
‘What has Rome got to do with Kolkata?’
‘Plenty. Believe me –the puja organizers are real genius. They dream up a theme like making the pandal out of seashells. And – procure them from people who will pay them back when required. It’s a major political game. Sponsors shell out the money and the organizers make the most of the opportunity.’
‘Now I understand why the awards go to those with political connections.’
‘Durga Puja today is about selfish people and selfies,’ Shiva said. (to be concluded …)


Image courtesy wikimediacommons.org


Some more interesting links -

Taiwan struck by Typhoon Megi, third typhoon in two weeks

Terrorist alarm in Uran was the figment of a 12-year-old schoolgirl's imagination

Tourist season in Kaziranga National Park to start from October 1 instead of November 1


Moody is off mood – Na Buzz had fooled him again (satire)

Didi’s version of ABCD - cycle to work to bypass potholes (satire)

Goddess Durga and her kids wait for the annual bash (satire)


9300 people killed in Russian airstrikes in Syria during last year

MH17 flight shot down by rocket over Ukraine in 2014 was work of pro-Moscow rebels

Shooting in Burlington - gunman on the run after shooting dead four women in a shopping center


Mark Wahlberg talks about movie on Deepwater Horizon explosion in the Gulf of Mexico

Adele creates a record - her latest album 25 has gone platinum in the US

Movie memorabilia go under the hammer - Batman's batpod fetches £312,000

Lord Shiva in the world of deodorants (satire)

Lord Shiva had a lot of time on his hands because his better half Goddess Durga was busy preparing for her annual visit to her mother’s place. And, her children were also excited at the prospect of seeing and feeling the additions to the skyline that keep springing up everywhere.
Suddenly his trusted disciple Bhringi came up and drew him aside.
‘I hate to see you so lonely,’ he whispered.
‘I am waiting for them to leave,’ Shiva said. ‘Then I’ll have the whole of Mount Kailash to myself.’
‘I have an idea,’ Bhringi sidled up to him.
‘What?’ Shiva also lowered his voice.
‘Why don’t we go and visit one of those shopping malls?’

‘But I don’t need to buy anything.’
‘You don’t need to,’ Bhringi assured.
‘Why should anyone go to a shopping mall if he does not want to buy anything?’
‘The majority of them go for window shopping,’ Bhringi said. ‘Your bare body is OK, so is your long matted hair but, that tiger skin would not do.’
‘Why?’
'Tigers are a protected species and if anyone sees you in a tiger skin, they’ll put you behind bars.’
‘What is the solution?’
‘Give me a spare tiger skin and I’ll shape it into a Bermuda,’ Bhringi grinned. ‘Once the girls see you in that, they will want to take selfies with you.’
‘Selfies?’
‘Yes. That is the latest craze. They’ll presume that you are a celebrity of Bollywood or Tollywood or Hollywood or some other wood – and getting a selfie with you will boost their popularity among friends.’
And, so it came to pass that Lord Shiva and his trusted disciple landed up in one of the shopping malls in the City of Joy. At the entrance to one of the shops, enclosed in glass, were a bunch of boys and girls engaged in animated conversation.
‘What are they talking about?’ Shiva asked.
Bhringi eavesdropped and smiled.
‘They are discussing about a new brand of deo?’
‘Deo?’
‘Abbreviation for deodorant,’ Bhringi explained. ‘Obnoxious body odors ruin lives, especially for youngsters. And – good fragrance acts as magnet to attract the fair ones.’
‘You mean like animals who follow the scent to make a kill?’
‘Yes. Moreover, these deo manufacturers have spawned a whole new range of beauties who appear in ads. Their motto is to follow the scent and bag the prize.’ (to be continued …)


Image courtesy wikimediacommons.org


Some more interesting links -

Disneyland bans 25 things including selfie sticks in all its locations

Hillary Clinton has pneumonia - she fell ill at September 11 memorial

Lord Ganesh's laddu weighing 21-Kg auctioned for Rs 14.65 in Hyderabad


Moody wants Gold medals from Olympics (satire)

Didi and her BMW dreams (satire)

Goddess Durga and her kids wait for the annual bash (satire)


Suicide bomb attack in Pakistani mosque during Friday prayers kill at least 25

Security beefed up for Munich Oktoberfest 2016

29 people injured in an explosion in New York - no evidence of any terror link


Shah Rukh's 'Fan' and Salman Khan's 'Sultan' to be screened at Busan International Film Festival

Sequel to Guardians of the Galaxy to release in US theaters on May 5, 2017

London-born singer Skepta wins the 25th Mercury prize fr his album Konnichiwa