It is difficult to mop up black money

The source of one’s earnings are usually authentic like employment or business. One portion of these go to the government. These are the norms all over the world and followed dutifully. However, in some countries, people do not like to part with their money. They falsify documents and conceal the money in hard to locate places – they choose banks where one can park his cash safely. These are unaccounted money and is known as black money. Switzerland is famous for its watches, the Alps and banks where it is not too difficult to open an account and store money and other valuables because those will be difficult to locate. It seems it is a global phenomenon and it is customary to refer to such holdings as ‘black money.’ Black is usually associated with evil – like black magic. Witches wear black clothes, and no one likes the black sheep in a family. However, the Men in Black was an exception – it was a Hollywood movie and dealt with Extra-terrestrials ETs. There was also a Bollywood movie of 2005 titled Black where Rani Mukherjee portrayed the role of a blind girl. To her the world was black. Amitabh Bachhan was also there.

To return to the subject of black money. It is a topic that can embarrass people in high places. Those in power in the government know about the existence of such unaccounted assets but are unable to lay hands on them. It would amount to stirring up the hornets’ nest. Therefore, they follow the policy of let sleeping dogs lie. In India, there was jubilation when BJP came to power. The new Prime Minister made an announcement on the subject but there has been no visible progress on the issue. Indian kitty in Swiss banks jumped 50% to over ₹30,000 crore in 2021

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Moody gets a call from Ronald Grump (satire)

Moody, like any blacksmith, loves to strike when the iron is hot - striking has always been his strength. After the well planned and executed surgical strike, he went ahead with his black money strike. Black money is a subject that everyone loves to talk about. And black money when added to Swiss banks make for a heady cocktail.
Of course, Moody himself shies away from cocktails and no one knows for certain whether he has ever tasted the harmless mocktails.
The ringing of the hotline brought Moody back to reality. It was the new Uncle Sam better known as Ronald Grump – a man who is unpredictable.

‘Namaste Ronald-ji,’ Moody greeted him.
‘What’s that you said just now?’ Ronald asked.
‘It is our way of salutation,’ Moody explained. ‘A welcome message Ronald-ji.’
‘My name is Ronald, Ronny for short,’ Ronald grunted. ‘I hear you have taken a very bold step in a hurry and have fallen in a pit. It does not help your image. Your people are still one century behind us and you want to overtake us.’
‘I beg to differ,’ Moody replied. ‘Our civilization is way ahead of yours.’
‘That is why you have to hammer home the message about cleanliness, build toilets, clean your rivers, is it? Look buddy, your priorities are confused.’
‘Our civilization is way ahead of yours. We invented the flying machine much before you did. It was the flying chariot - Ravana used it to kidnap Sita.’
Ronald gave a hearty laugh.
‘I know all that. You invented the zero, you invented yoga, you invented the snake charmers and you have hundreds of Godmen who perform miracles. Wake up man, there is more to living than is revealed in your philosophies.’
‘OK,’ Moody replied. ‘What is it you want?’
‘I want you to know that I talked with your pal the other day. It was a pleasant surprise. He is such a nice man. I wonder why you can’t get along with him.’
‘I don’t understand who you are talking about,’ Moody murmured.
‘Your neighbor,’ Ronald laughed. ‘Both of you were buddies, you exchanged gifts and you even dropped in on him one day, unannounced. And – all of a sudden you don’t want to talk with him! What’s the problem?’ (to be continued …)


Image courtesy wikimediacommons.org


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Moody learns about the Panama Papers (satire)

It had come like a bolt from the blue and had got Moody worried – it was the Panama Papers scandal and involved innumerable big names from all over the world. Some of them were Big names from the cine world. And – all of them had apparently stashed away millions of their money in this offshore tax haven.
Moody had heard about Panama hats and the Panama Canal and also a cigarette whose brand name was Panama – but, this Panama Papers was a new one.

Suddenly Jet Lee entered his office. He had shed some more weight.
‘What is this Panama Papers leak all about?’ Moody asked him.
‘It is another tax haven,’ Jet Lee replied. ‘Some big names have emerged and they are big enough to take care of themselves.’
‘You mean we do not have to worry?’
‘Yes, sort of,’ Jet Lee assured.
‘I heard some of our movie stars feature in the list,’ Moody said.
‘Well – when they boast of earnings of crores of rupees from every movie, they know how to keep their money secure.’
‘Then how about working out a scheme to make them part with a portion of that money?’
At this point, Baba Someday entered. He looked excited.
‘Have you heard?’ he came up to Moody and asked. ‘First the Swiss banks and now the Panama connection. Achhe Din is fast approaching. I think you can now fulfill your pre-election promise of transferring Rs 35,000 to everybody’s bank account.’
‘Baba-ji, it is not so simple,’ Jet Lee explained. ‘There are lots of formalities and legal hurdles. My boys are already on the job. We will get the money back and happy days will be here again.’
The Panama Papers connection had added yet another dimension to the hunt for Black Money that Moody has talked about. He had been led to believe that all unaccounted money was hidden in Swiss banks. He had also presumed that those who held money there used to go on Swiss vacations and bring back portions of their ill-gotten gains.
But – it was not a simple affair. He had sent Sue Sharma to try and convince the bankers to part with the information and she came back with a list of a few hundred when the expectation was in millions. Moody had also sent Jet Lee on the mission and he himself was always trying to bring up the subject at every forum. However, the expectation of quick results did not materialize and, his promises of acche din kept going out of reach. (to be continued …)


Image courtesy wikimediacommons.org

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