Didi wants Red Road to be renamed (satire)

Didi wanted the oath-taking ceremony to be a very grand affair attended by dignitaries of every hue and color. She had proved to the world at large that she can deliver the goods even when faced with all sort of odds. She was also satisfied that the Reds had been put in their place.
Suddenly Moo Cool rang her up. She had entrusted him with the task of inviting the glitterati of Delhi and, therefore, he had flown down to the capital.
‘Yes Moo Cool, how is it going?’ she asked.
‘Fine. I have met all those who matter and they have assured that they’ll make it a point to be present. But – Jet Lee has some doubts. He wants to talk with you.’
‘OK – I’ll ring him up.’
‘Don’t worry. He is right here with me.’

‘Fine. Put him on.’
‘Congrats Madam,’ Jet Lee wished her. ‘I knew you will come through.’
‘I also knew. I kept it a secret.’
‘Your toils have paid off. Watching you going from one place to another and convincing the masses was done beautifully. You have plenty of admirers here.’
‘Thanks. I had to fight with a handicap of 34 years of misrule and empty coffers. The Reds had left me a legacy of a huge burden debts.’
Jet Lee laughed.
‘You have put the Reds in their place now. You deserve full credit. We’ll come to the program. By the way – where are you holding it? ’
‘I want to invite the whole city,’ Didi said. ‘Therefore I’ve decided to have it in the open, on the road.’
‘You mean in the Maidan or outside Nabanna?’
‘No. It will be on a still bigger road.’
‘It is monsoon season. Don’t you think it would be risky to do this program outdoors when rains can spoil the show at any moment?’
It was now Didi’s turn to laugh.
‘We have the best super soppers with us. We have used it during cricket matches.’
‘Good. Then we need not worry,’ Jet Lee said. ‘Hope you will arrange for choppers to take us to the venue from the airport.’
‘Leave all that to my team of Moo Cool and Dee Wreck,’ Didi said. ‘They are experts.’
‘Fine. And – where is this venue?’
‘It is the Red Road,’ Didi said.
‘Red Road? But – you have driven out all the Reds from your territory, haven’t you?’
‘Don’t worry. This Red will also go one day. We love to rename roads.’ (to be continued …)


Image courtesy wikimediacommons.org

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Monsoons and Didi’s flipflops aka Hawaii chappals (satire)

It was raining cats and dogs and Didi had to be escorted from her car to her house by Abhi Shake who protected her with the umbrella. Of course, only her head was protected because when the rains are accompanied by gusts of wind, the clothes will get wet – as well as her trademark Hawaii chappals. Abhi had a standby pair of chappals and, once she entered her house, he dutifully placed the dry chappals at her feet.
Didi was pleased and rewarded him with a smile and it did not escape Moo Cool’s eyes. Neither dirt it escape the gazes of Dee Wreck, Omit Misra, Show Van and Patro Chatto.

They had been waiting to meet her and seeing Abhi Shake with herm they knew that Abhi had stolen a march over them. ‘I don’t see some of our people,’ Didi murmured as she occupied her throne.
‘These sudden rains must have delayed them,’ Moo Cool said.
‘It is monsoon time and it will rain. Does it mean we will not do our regular work? Do we not have our lunch and dinner?’
Moo Cool did not have a ready answer. He wanted to say that rains meant khichdi – piping hot khichdi with a dollop of ghee and begun bhaja plus omelet but he checked himself. Unless he knew her mood, he just could not open his mouth.
Suddenly the kettle of tea arrived with a basket of onion fries or piyaji – there were two boys who worked in the nearby restaurant. It supplied the tea and snacks.
Didi took a sip of tea and glanced at the bunch of papers on her desk. There were the daily newspapers and some mail of importance that she needed to go through.
It was Omit Misra who finally dared to speak.
‘How do we celebrate this time?’ he asked. His question was not addressed to anyone – he just wanted to start a discussion.
‘As usual,’ Moo Cool volunteered a reply.
‘There are reports that others may take over some areas,’ Dee Wreck said. ‘I have been studying the social networking sites and get a feeling that things are not as rosy as we would like them to be.’
‘Rubbish,’ Patro Chatto shifted his bulk in the chair. He had put on a lot of weight and, this time, he must get a home gym to ensure that his weight was in check.
The ringing of the mobile phone drew all eyes on Show Van. He listened and his face lit up with a huge smile.
‘It is the man from the Embassy,’ he said.
‘Which Embassy?’ Didi asked.
‘The Chinese Embassy,’ Show Van said. ‘They want to know about the Durga Puja and their travel plans during the festival.’
‘Tell them that Nabanna will keep them informed,’ Abhi Shake said.
‘And – one of them has developed Hawaii chappals for the monsoons. It is covered and the feet won’t get wet. They want Didi to try it out.’ ((to be continued …)


Image courtesy wikimediacommons.org

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Didi announces holiday for Maha Shivratri (satire)

It is well known that our beloved Didi is a generous woman – her heart bleeds for the millions of kids who do not have shoes, for the millions of girls who do not have bicycles, for the millions of youth who are educated but do not have any job. She wants her people to be happy.
Suddenly her phone rang – it was Moo Cool.
‘Yes,’ she said.
‘I have drafted the notification for the holiday,’ Moo Cool said. ‘Shall I bring it to you for signature?’
‘Give it to Patro Chatto,’ Didi instructed. ‘He knows what to do. With a holiday on Maha Shivratri our people will be happy. That is what I want. I want my people to be happy. They will get a long weekend and will enjoy it in the zoo garden or Nico Park.’

‘And – the rumors of tie up is increasing,’ Moo Cool added.
‘I am not worried. I have come up the hard way,’ she went on. ‘I have my own strategies. I know how to cozy up to whom and when. I will never be distracted by anybody.’
‘Some of our boys are misbehaving again and again,’ Moo Cool said. ‘They are becoming greedy.’
‘I have scolded them. You are there to take care of Arra Bull, Money Rule and Anu Mandel. People like you yourself, Dee Wreck, Abhi Shake are my pillars. You know how to deal with them.’
And, Didi cut off the phone.
It is a vicious circle in which she was caught – but, she was not worried. She had at her disposal several Gouri Sens who would willingly bend over backwards to fulfil her wishes, no matter how outlandish they may be.
Sitting in her chamber in Nabanna, our Didi knew that she has the world eating out of her hand. She knew that she had a whole lot of enemies but she was not afraid – she had created a team of Franksteins and it was a formidable force.
She called them her team of naughty boys (and, girls). Yes, she had empowered the girls also because it was a war to her and, as the saying goes, all is fair in love and war.
With a sigh, she removed the covering from the canvas on the easel and picked up the paint brush. The time had come to paint another rosy picture. (to be continued …)


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