Moody gets a call from Uncle Sam and takes a trip to Mars (satire)

It was a long time that Moody had not gone abroad and, therefore, he was wondering if the world had forgotten all about him. He remembered the famous saying ‘out of sight, out of mind’ and shook his head. No – he did not want the world to forget him. He had made a name for himself within a very short time knew that he held all the aces.
It was at this moment that his phone rang – it was the direct hotline with Uncle Sam.
‘Hi there,’ Uncle Sam wished him. ‘How are things out there?’
‘Fine,’ Moody said. ‘Everything is just fine. How about you? And, your retirement plans?’
‘It’s all taken care of. Tell me – I heard that you are getting waxing done.’
Moody laughed.
‘It is all for a good cause,’ he explained. ‘They want me in the company of celebrities and, I just cannot refuse them.’

‘You are lucky. You have blazed a trail like no other. With so many selfies to your credit, and so many millions of followers on Twitter, you have an identity. I have a suggestion.’
‘Go ahead, I am all ears.’
‘I think you have plans to send a satellite to Mars?’
‘Of course. My men have the capability. Remember – we have invented the flying machine long before the Wright Brothers. The Demon King Ravana used it to kidnap our beloved Sita-mata.’
‘Yes, I know all about that. Only – it has not been recorded properly in the annals of history. Anyway – what is latest about your Mangalyaan?’
‘It is working fine. You said you wanted to put forth a suggestion?’
‘Yes. I just want to know what items you will send to Mars in the first lot.’
‘My technical team is on the job. I hate to interfere in their workings.’
‘But – you must have given them some broad guidelines.’
‘Of course. Our first batch of items would include ayurvedic roots, barks of medicinal trees, CDs of yoga practices. These would be invaluable to the first batch of Indian astronauts who will land on the Red Planet Mars.’
‘You mean your men would depend on yoga and roots to survive on the distant planet?’
‘Why not? Our sages used to sit under trees and meditate for years. The journey to Mars would be no problem.’
‘What about space suits and zero gravity? How’ll your boys overcome that?’
‘Yoga my friend is the solution. Baba Someday is already on the job training the future astronauts. In a secret cave in the Himalayas he is busy on Mission Mars.’
‘Happy dreams,’ Uncle Sam rang off, Moody woke up with a start and rubbed his eyes. Then he reached for his intercom. He must get the latest on Mangalyaan. (to be continued …)


Image courtesy wikimediacommons.org

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Rum Mudda reminds Moody about temples (satire)

Moody was subdued. Normally he took the lead but, of late, he was apprehensive. The ringing of the phone kept jolting him out of his trance. Yes, he was in a sort of a trance. Ever since the infiltration of bees, his friends from across the Seas kept reminding him that he must tread with greater caution. One must be careful while handling roses, they have thorns.
Suddenly the dreaded phone rang.
‘What is happening to my temple?’ it was Rum Mudda at the other end. He was Moody’s Boss and he sounded to be in a not-too-happy mood.
‘Temple?’ Moody squirmed in his chair.
‘Yes,’ Mudda expressed his annoyance. ‘I expected that you would put the matter on the fast track. But you are moving at a snail’s pace.’
‘I have my liabilities,’ Moody tried to explain. ‘It is a sensitive issue and it has to be given sufficient time. It falls in the category of ‘handle with care.’ Haste will make waste.’

‘What do you mean?’ Rum Mudda was impatient.
‘Work is on in full swing,’ Moody said. ‘I am keeping a tab on the progress and am getting regular feedback.’
‘But – we must declare a timeframe.’
‘Don’t worry Mudda-ji, all will come in due course. You cannot put the cat before the horse. Therefore, you must have patience.’
‘Oh Moody-ji, we have waited too long, we want to see the temple.’
‘Our boys have made a model. I have seen it when I last visited the workshop. It is just the right size to fit into the cavity of the rocket.’
‘Workshop? Rocket? What are you talking about?’ Rum Mudda flared up.
‘I am talking about the model of the temple that our boys in ISRO are making. They will send it to Mars in Mangalyaan-2. We will do what America or Russia or France or Japan have never thought of doing. We will position our temple, the first ever temple, on the Red Planet Mars. It will be a tribute to my Make in India philosophy.’ (to be continued …)

(Image courtesy wikimediacommons.org

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