Didi rolls out the red carpet (satire)

Didi has come up from the ranks and knows just how to win friends and influence people. Believe it or not, she could have been a strong challenger to Dale Carnegie because she has her methods that she has perfected over a period of time.
Her main weapon is surprise – no one can foretell what is going in her mind.
That is why Moo Cool was always wary of her.
‘What are you doing with those forces that have landed up?’ she asked him.
‘They are new here,’ Moo Cool said. ‘They are looking around.’
‘For what?’
‘Needles in the haystacks,’ Moo Col replied with a straight face.
‘Have you seen to their comfort?’
‘Yes,’ Arra Bull said. ‘We have provided them with mosquito repellant creams.’
‘What about their accommodation?’
‘We have requisitioned some schools,’ Patro Chatto said.
‘And food?’

‘Well – their diets are different to ours,’ Money Rule said. ‘Many of them do not eat fish or rosogollas. But – our cooks are ensuring that they get what they want.’
‘Keep them well fed. I don’t want them to complain about these minor irritants like food, accommodation etcetera.’
‘Don’t worry, my boys are taking full care of them,’ Moo Cool said.
‘What about their patrolling duties?’
‘They have made a routine to go around in the mornings and evenings. No trouble so far.’
‘Good – maintain a good rapport with them. But – what about the officers from various parts of the country who have been sent here?’
‘They are also fully comfortable,’ it was now the turn of Dee Wreck.
‘Remember - they need to be kept in good humor.’
‘We had arranged special passes to watch the T20 match,’ Moo Cool explained. ‘And – there were special screenings of the latest movies released.’
‘Have you not suggested that they go marketing?’
‘Yes. My boys have arranged for that,’ Dee Wreck said. ‘After all, we have plenty to offer in the form of handicrafts plus wide range of sarees. They have heard about these and, now, they have seen them and are impressed.’
‘It is up to you to keep them happy. They should not interfere too much in our workings. They have a duty to perform, let them do it. They want to transfer my police officers – fine. They have to show their work to their higher ups. But – let them know the boundaries and not overstep.’
‘Don’t worry,’ Moo Cool assured. ‘They will not create trouble. When D-day comes, they may not be in the station. They could go to visit relatives or fall sick. Anything can happen – so keep your fingers crossed.’ (to be continued …)


Image courtesy wikimediacommons.org

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Lord Shiva watches the antics of Didi (satire)

Lord Shiva was in a good mood – he held the binocular to his eyes and it was focused on the airport. He was watching big names walking down the lounge to get into their vehicles and make a beeline for the dinner date with Didi, the keeper of all she surveys.
‘At last things seem to be happening,’ Shiva mused.
‘What things?’ Durga asked.
She was standing beside Shiva – she was also in a happy mood. This year, winter was not severe and, that was why there was no need to put on warm clothes.
She realized that fashion changes with the time and that is why a new trend was emerging. She could see men and women with the shawl slung over the shoulder – they did not wrap it around the body as they normally did in the past. She first saw it in some TV serials, and she now knew the reason.
‘So many celebrities at a time in the airport!’ Shiva chuckled. ‘Didi has at last something to brag about. I saw a couple of central Ministers in the crowd.’

‘Yes,’ Durga grinned. ‘She has invited them to come.’
‘What is the occasion?’
‘Could be a late New Year party,’ Durga said. ‘She was so busy touring the countryside and, with all her meetings and distribution of cycles, she must have realized that she forgot about her New Year party.’
‘I heard she has personally rung up the invitees,’ Shiva murmured.
‘Yes, she knows how effective any personal approach is,’ Durga explained. ‘She wants positive results. Her time is running out and she needs to make sure that she does not go into oblivion.’
‘OK – but, tell me, she is always crying that she has no money. Then how does she manage to gift so many bicycles?’ ‘That is her secret,’ Durga smiled. ‘It is an example of woman power. They can do wonders.’
‘Do you have any idea about what her agenda is?’
Durga gave a hearty laugh.
‘It is just a dinner date in Nicco Park,’ she said. ‘All the big chefs will bowl over the guests. They will dance to the tunes of Bollywood heroes and heroines and, on the side, will discuss whether to invest in handicrafts industry or pickles industry.’
‘But – they have been debating for the last four years.’
‘Such debates will go on and on. Industrialists will come and go and Ganga will flow on forever.’ (to be continued …)

(Image courtesy wikimediacommons.org

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