Good bye floods and droughts (satire)

Water is essential for life as we know it and, as we try to migrate to other planets, our first concern is water. The logic is, if water exists, so can lifeforms. On our planet Earth, water is available in plenty but, the distribution is haphazard. While some areas pine for a drop of water, other areas suffer from an abundance in the form of floods.
That is why Moody has deep furrows on his forehead – a sign of worry.
Every year there are scenes of flooded localities with relief packages being airdropped and people running to collect the food packets. There are the aerial surveys by the minister concerned to flood affected areas to assess the extent of drainage which would translate into the amount of central aid.
Side by side there are droughts – farmers sit hunched up on their parched farmlands waiting for rains and, unable to repay the loans they had taken, resort to committing suicides.
Moody wants to change all that. He does not like to hear about unhappiness among his people. He wants them to be happy. Share is his message. Those who have plenty should not hesitate to share some of it with others who are not so fortunate.
Moody, therefore, sent for two of his assistants - Hash Budden and Nitty Gadcurry.

‘I want to discuss water,’ he said.
‘Well,’ Hash Budden began. ‘There are many water purifiers in the market. All of them guarantee pure water. If we go for bulk purchase, we will get huge discounts.’
‘I don’t mean that,’ Moody shook his head.
‘Oh! You mean you want to discuss bottled mineral water?’
‘No. I am worried about water for the masses.’
‘Then we must be careful. The ground water is depleting and, to preserve whatever is available, we must ban bore wells. Moreover, these bore wells are dangerous. Kids keep falling into them and the media people have to spend hours in the night suffering mosquito bites as they give live coverage of rescue operations.’
‘Hash-ji, I am on a different frequency,’ Moody appeared to be exasperated.
‘Oh!’ Hash Budden was deflated.
‘Why don’t we link up the rivers?’ Moody shot his question.
‘We are drawing up plans,’ Nitty joined in the conservation.
‘I don’t want plans. I want action. How soon can we link up the Ganges with the Godavari and Cauvery?’
‘Well – work has started and we can expect to see results soon.’
‘Give me a timeframe,’ Moody demanded.
‘That is not easy,’ Gadcurry shifted in the chair. ‘There are many uncertainties. Especially with the Ganges. It needs to be cleaned up first otherwise the pollution would spread to all the other rivers.’
‘I see,’ Moody nodded his head. Then he began to doodle on the pad in front of him. The doodle looked like a meandering river. (to be continued …)
(Image courtesy wikimediacommons.org)


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Mahalaya means Chandi Path

Mahalaya is the auspicious day when the Durga Pujas begin with the artist drawing the eyes of the idols of Goddess Durga – and, the panic sets in inside the Kumartuli where the idols are painstakingly made ready. In case of sudden rains, which is not uncommon, the artisans have to not only protect the clay idols safe from the rainwater but also have to resort to artificial drying by heating with blow torches to dry the paint.
Simultaneously, on this day, there is a special program broadcast over Akashvani (earlier All India Radio). It is called Chandi Path and it starts at 4am and goes on till 5.30am. It is the invocation of Goddess Durga and describes, through devotional songs, about her journey from Kailash to annihilate the demon King Asura who has the ability to change his form at will. He is an evil force and, like all evil, can change the form to attack others.
Durga Devi, armed with ten weapons donated by ten different Gods, succeeds in eliminating Asura and continues to the abode of her parents in Bengal.
This early morning program was totally Bengali one but, subsequently, other stations of Akashvani (like Delhi) began – only, it starts half an hour later and while the commentary is in Hindi, the songs remain original Bengali songs.

Another aspect of Mahalaya is the ritual of ‘tarpan’ that people perform on the banks of the River Ganges – this ritual is in remembrance of one’s parents, relatives and ancestors who have passed away into the nether world. The usual practice in Kolkata is for people to listen to the ‘Chandi Path’ and then proceed to the banks of the Ganges for the ‘tarpan’.
And – ye another important activity connected to Mahalaya is the shopping. Usually, this is the time when employees get their bonuses and, shops offer discounts. Obviously, there is a mad rush and the crowds have to be seen to be believed. These shops do not cater to the moneyed class and credit cards are seldom used. (to be continued …)

Image courtesy wikimediacommons.org

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A look at the fish crazy Bengalis

It is a well-known fact that Bengalis are crazy about fish but, somewhere down the line, they have had to change their tastes from the small size tasty fish to larger fish that do have their values but do not taste like the ones fifty years back.
The main problem with the small size fish was its preparation prior to frying and cooking. These fishes had plenty of scales and getting rid of these annoying externals was a major headache for the mothers of yore. Usually the task would be assigned to elderly women in the family who had plenty of spare time or to the maid servants. It was the days prior to the arrival of LPGs on the scene and when the ovens would be coal fired. The ash that was left over at the end of the day would be carefully preserved and would be used in descaling the fish.

Yes, the women had a tact – they would hold the fish in between the fingers, dip it in the ash and then proceed to remove the scales. After that was doe, they would clean the internals and pick up the next one. Obviously, it was a time consuming affair but, once these small size fish went through the cleaning process and was coked and served, the dish would leave its taste in the mouth long after the meal was over.
Unfortunately, such women are nowhere around. They have vanished like the coal fired ovens and fish lovers have to now depend on the fish seller to clean and cut the fish to size. As a result, the attraction of small size fish have been lost. The craze is now for large size fish like rohu, katla, bhetki, prawns etcetera – these are easy to handle. Same goes for the ones that do not have the annoying scales – fish like pabda or tangra.
Of course, exceptions will always be there – and, the exception is the hilsa. It has scales but no one is much bothered because, beneath those scales lies a fish that tastes divine. It may be sourced from the Padma River in Bangladesh or from our very own River Ganges but, it is certainly the Lord of the Rings. (to be continued …)
(Image courtesy wikimediacommons.org)

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Pollution of the River Ganges in Kanpur

River Ganges is a holy river that originates in the Himalayas and flows through several states before finally meeting the Bay of Bengal. The water of this holy river is required in practically all religious ceremonies and every family stores and preserves some of this water in their house. This is especially true for those who live away from the river.
This mighty river flows through the city of Kanpur and, one day, I wanted to go and sit on the banks of the River Ganges – it was during my stay in J K colony and, after reaching the place, I was shocked to see the nature and extent of pollution.
Kanpur is famous for its leather tanneries and, automatically, footwear made in Kanpur come dirt cheap. But, this is not about footwear – it is about pollution of the Ganges. Believe it or not, the wastes from the leather processing plants flowed directly into the waters in trickles from different directions. The stench was unbearable and the condition of the water near the banks looked anything but holy.
That was the situation in the 1960s and, in spite of Ganga Action Plans of the government, not much progress has been made. Of course, funds had been earmarked but, true to Indian tradition, the money must have been spent on activities that did not help the cause.
In spite of past failures, the newly elected government of Narendra Modi has now assigned a full time Minister to look after cleaning of the Ganga. There are plans to not just clan the waters of unwanted foreign materials but also to dredge it and convert the river into a regular waterway between the cities on its banks.
It would be a pleasant sight to see launches and motor boats plying on the Ganga. Once that finally happens, it would be a boon to the Nation. (to be continued …)

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