Lord Shiva and Goddess Durga discuss swipe machines (satire)

The electronic age has finally caught up with Lord Shiva, Goddess Durga and the whole of Mount Kailash. People are really growing up at last and, in spite of polluted River Ganga and people sitting on railway tracks every morning, they are learning to swipe plastic cards.

‘Did you hear the news?’ Shiva asked Durga.
‘News are always happening,’ Dutga replied. Her eyes were on the TV screen. She was watching in rapt admiration as a woman fried brinjals and, simultaneously, explained the intricate process of how to make the final product attractive. Unless it appealed to her family members, there was no majaa.
‘The lovely tinkle of coins and the feel of crisp bank notes would soon be a thing of the past,’ Shiva mumbled. ‘That is a good idea,’ Durga replied. ‘It will create a healthy society.’
‘What do you mean?’ Shiva was surprised. ‘Do you know how many people have died standing in ATM queues to collect new bank notes? And the tension they suffer from to get change for Rs 2000 notes?’
‘My dear husband, don’t you realize that coins and notes carry germs and spread diseases. They pass from one hand to another and pick up unwanted germs. Is it not a good decision to ban such disease carriers?’
‘Agreed’ Shiva smiled. ‘But – it will put the doctors out of business. And – also the manufacturers of medicines.’
‘They will go in for manufacture of swipe machines,’ Durga said. ‘The market of these machines is growing. Even beggars are keeping these with them. They also have to survive.’
‘I never looked at it in this way,’ Shiva said. ‘It will give a huge boost to the Make in India campaign. But – there is another problem.’
‘What is that?’
‘What’ll happen to the piggy banks where housewives used to store their ill-gotten gains made out of their hubby’s wallets?’
‘They have become obsolete. Wallets today are all electronic wallets.’ (to be continued …)


Image courtesy wikimediacommons.org

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