Moody wants to see smiling faces all around (satire)

It was a tough job to tackle growing menace of people who should keep their mouths shut but, no matter how he reacted, Moody discovered that there will always be people who spew venom and he had to rein in such rowdy elements. That was his agenda of the day and, in order to assist him in his exercise, he had with him the brains - on top of the list were his trusted lieutenants Jet Lee, Sue Sharma, Banka Nadoo, Nitty Gadcurry and Rajanna King.
‘I pity the young man,’ Moody chuckled to himself. ‘He should know that little knowledge is a dangerous thing.’
‘It is a result of faulty upbringing,’ Banka Nadoo said. ‘Empty vessels make most sound.’
‘Yes,’ Sue Sharma agreed. ‘I felt pity for the kid. He was tying himself up into knots.’

‘Of course he had a purpose,’ Jet Lee sounded serious. ‘He was, no doubt, playing to the galleries but the galleries were empty. He is moving ahead. He has changed over time and will be fun to play around with.’
Moody looked at Rajanna King who was playing the role of a silent spectator.
‘What is your opinion?’ Moody asked him directly.
‘We should take a proper decision,’ he said.’ We must not rush into anything. It may boomerang as we have seen with that other kid.’
‘Don’t worry,’ Moody was calm. ‘That is a passing phase. Our people are there and they know how to tackle such situations. Youngsters will shout their heads off and we, as seniors, can keep a watch on developments. Talking about developments – where has your river linking project come Gadcurry-ji?’
‘Actually Uma-ji is deep into her Ganga cleaning activities and I am waiting for her feedback on how deep the water is. Once I get that feedback, I will plan my routes. Varanasi will, of course, be in the center of activities.’
“And – center of attraction,’ Moody reminded. ‘It will undergo sea change and become a mini Japanese city. Our friends in the land of the rising Sun are excited.’
‘I know,’ Nitty Gadcurry said. ‘Bullet and Varanasi are our trump cards. Folks from behind the bamboo curtain are unhappy but we cannot please everybody, can we?’
‘The black money is a tricky issue,’ Jet Lee admitted. ‘Baba Someday is also unhappy. He had expected that the money would roll in and fill our coffers but, that is not happening.’
Moody became philosophical.
‘We all know that Rome was not built in a day,’ he said. ‘We must have patience. We have many more miles to go. This is not the end of the world. I want to see smiling faces all around me. Let us smile for a selfie.’ (to be continued …)


Image courtesy wikimediacommons.org

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Moody throws light on conversion and smartness (satire)

#SmartCity Ever since he took over office, Moody has wanted to impress people with his visions and there is no denying the fact that he has succeeded in leaving behind his trademark on whatever he has touched. Including conversion. And, the conversion of a dull, lackluster city to a Smart City is one of his brainwaves.
‘Your plan to create Smart Cities is a smart one,’ Banka Nadoo told Moody who had called him to his office.
‘Good. My plans are always smart ones. Tell me, how have the people accepted the first list of 20 cities destined to become Smart Cities?’ he asked Banka Nadoo.
‘There has been mixed reactions,’ Banka said. ‘In fact, many of them do not know how to go about it.’
‘It is so simple,’ Moody said. ‘Varanasi will show them the way. It is not in the list now but it will soon be as smart and likeable as any Japanese city with kimono clad women on the roads.’
‘There had been ideas floating around of making Mumbai into Shanghai and Kolkata to London. Bit – they never pursued them.’

‘That is why they did not get to first base,’ Moody chuckled. ‘Actually, smartness is in our blood. We want to look smart. The girls go in for skin treatments, they follow the style of their heroines. And – the boys copy their filmi heroes or cricket heroes. Why can’t the cities follow suit and copy another city that boats of smartness.’
‘Pardon me, but I think many of the city fathers have no idea of smart cities.’
‘Can they not go on tours to the cities and gather information firsthand?’
‘They are doing it. One team had recently been to Andaman to study how to control flooding in cities,’ Banka Nadoo elaborated. ‘But, critics have bashed them saying that they have spent taxpayer’s money on a useless mission. It is common knowledge that drains are clogged by plastics and thermocol hence the flooding takes place.’
‘They should have gone to some European country to study how to paint the city walls. That way they would have earned bouquets and not brickbats. Anyway – tell me, how would you go about making your city smart?’
‘I will have only the smart looking men and women on the roads during the day. Others can use the roads at night.’
‘Not bad. What about vehicles?’
‘Same logic – only the smart vehicles will ply in the day. The ramshackle buses and more than 15-year-old vehicles will not see the light of day, they’ll do the night shift.’
‘How about the roadside hawkers? They spoil the beauty of any city. How will you eliminate them from the scenery?’
‘They hawk the goods to earn a living. They cannot be wished away because they are an integral part of our culture.’
‘And slums?’
‘They also are a necessary evil,’ Banka Nadoo replied. ‘We have to bear with them.’ (to be continued …)


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Bharat Judai Party stacking wood for the funeral pyre (satire)

Once touted as the Bharat Jodo Party, it is now busy scripting a recipe for destruction and might be renamed the Bharat Judai Party. There is a saying of putting nails in the coffin – here it seems to be an attempts to pile wood on to the funeral pyre!
The leaders feel they can get away with blue murder and some of them keep trying out new concepts of how to stir the hornet’s nest and watch it disturb a well set combination. They make atrocious comments just to see the effect it has on the masses and, within no time, retracts it saying that they were misquoted.
Poor Moody was a frustrated leader and in a dilemma.
His lieutenants are creating problems and he has to keep mending fences not just with outsiders but also within his own party seniors. He knows that he is always at a disadvantage and tries to make up for it by his oratory powers. Dhokla and lime juice are fine at times but not always – there must be variety.

‘Why don’t we get on with our agenda?’ he asked the minsters sitting in front of him.
‘I have not lost track of my agenda,’ Uma-ji, the Ganga Madam replied. ‘The banks of the river in Varanasi are regularly being cleaned. I am also keeping a check on the depth of water – it has not increased but had not reduced either. That is a good sign – we certainly can introduce trips across the Ganges soon.’
‘How soon?’ Moody asked.
‘Well – once the other localities do their cleaning part. The clean-up mission is a joint effort.’
Moody now looked at his minister of education.
‘And – what about our plans to modify the syllabus to include you know what.’
Ranee-ji gave her well known smile.
‘Don’t worry – things are under control. We have yet to complete two years – what we have achieved within this short time is unparalleled in history. Did you not see how those students in FTII finally surrendered?’
Moody now looked from Gadcurry to Jet Lee, Sue Sharma, Vicky Singh, Hash Budden and Baba Someday. They were the pillars on which Moody’s success depended.
‘Since all of us are here, I want to know why some of our people make statements that do more harm to us than good.’ ‘Actually – they want to get noticed.’
‘Today they say something and tomorrow they say they were misquoted. Do they not know that the novelty wears off and the cutting edge gets blunt if any weapon is used too often?’
‘They are novices, new to this job. It is the learning curve. Give them some time and they will become our assets.’ ‘Anyway,’ Moody sighed. ‘Our seniors are unhappy with the latest election results.’
‘It is actually the generation gap that is showing up,’ Sue Sharma looked at Jet Lee for confirmation.

(Image source wikimediacommons.org)

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