All about chest size and happy days (satire)

It was exactly two years ago that Moody came into the limelight – at the time he was proud of his 56 inches size chest. And, he has had to shoulder a lot of burden during the past two years. The question on everybody’s lips is – is the chest size still 56 inches? Have the happy days come?
Moody was alone in his chamber. All his colleagues had wished him on his achievements and his ministers had been burning the proverbial midnight oil to be ready with statistics to prove that they were the best.
Suddenly his hot line rang. It was Vladdy Putty.
‘Happy days are here again for me,’ he said. ‘I am going to play ice hockey. How are things going for you? What about your happy days?’

‘It is stocktaking time for me,’ Moody replied.
‘You have your fingers in too many pies,’ Putty said. ‘You should take them one by one.’
Moody knew that Putty was not too happy with him because of several reasons – most important being the deals related to arms and ammunition.
‘I have my methods,’ he said.
‘Anyway - first let me congratulate you on your achievements. I hear that you have accelerated activities connected to space travel?’
Moody laughed.
‘All of us are doing it. We want to settle on other planets.’
‘I know. Our planet is overcrowded. That is why we should engage in more wars. Instead of harping on peace we should talk war. War is the only method to reduce the population’
Moody gulped. He felt the talks were veering towards dangerous territories.
‘Excuse me,’ he said. ‘There is another caller on the line.’
‘Must be O’Vama – poor fellow. He’ll soon be out of a job. Why don’t you help him out? You have vacancies, don’t you?’’ The phone did ring but it was not O’Vama – it was Na Buzz, one of Moody’s neighbors.
‘Have the happy days finally come?’ he asked. ‘Have you measured?’
‘Measured what?’ Moody asked.
‘The size of your chest. It used to be 56 inches. Is it still the same?’
Moody sighed.
‘My dear friend’ he said. ‘Running a country is no joke. Especially when there is unrest everywhere.’
‘You mean terrorism?’
‘You know what I mean – there is no need to spell it out.’
‘Is that why you never put up in hotels when you go abroad?’
‘Actually I like to take care of myself – that is how my chest size is 56 inches.’
‘And – how are your plans shaping up? Especially the ones about cleaning the Ganges and the bullet rains and the Japanese city in India and the golden quadrangle?’
‘They’ll all come through,’ Moody said. ‘Rome was not built in one day.’
‘I know. I also know that Japan was destroyed in one day.’ (to be continued …)


Image courtesy wikimediacommons.org

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