Didi’s plans go awry – black money rears its head (satire)

Didi woke up to a new day after the wonderful evening spent in the company of celebrities of the silver screen. She personally handed over to them her paintings that are high value items – she had sold them to arrange finances for the historic campaign that brought to power.
But – there was gloom around her because there was a sea of housewives outside her house. They were badly affected by the sudden decision of scrapping old bank notes.
It was a real shock to these housewives because they had accumulated quite a lot of money in their secret piggy banks by diversion of funds allotted to them by their hubbies to take care of family expenses.

The amounts in these piggy banks came in handy for extra expenses and, keeping it secret was a sort of game that they played with their hubbies. It was an expression of saying in their way that ‘I too care’.
They were now at a loss of how to keep their treasure trove a secret.
Didi gave them a patient hearing and assured them that she would take up the matter with Delhi.
By the time they dispersed, there was another delegation that had arrived at her doorstep.
They were small time traders who dealt in the goodies of winter – goodies like nalen gur and joynagarer moah. All of a sudden they were stranded because there were no buyers. They wanted Didi to buy off their items and help them out. They suggested that she could store the products and sell them off through her well-oiled machinery as she did for potatoes.
Once again Didi assured them to look into the matter and explore possibilities of helping them out of this predicament.
By the time they left, there was a third group of people. They were the organizers of the exhibitions that are held during winter.
And – behind them were members of various syndicates. They did not know how to take care of the accumulated black money. They wanted her advice.
Didi immediately called an emergency meeting of her confidantes and, within no time, they arrived. There was Moo Cool, Patro Chatto, Show Van, Omit Misra, Dee Wreck, Golla Sen and, Chandi Ma. All of them appeared to be off mood. They had missed their Sunday special lunch of mutton dishes. None of the shops accepted Rs 2000 notes as payment towards of 1-Kg of mutton worth Rs 500 – they just did not have the change to give back! (to be continued …)


Image courtesy wikimediacommons.org


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Lord Shiva and the auto hub that did not happen (satire)

Durga was happy that there was hardly one month left to go before she would make the annual journey to her mother’s place. But, she was worried about Lord Shiva. He seemed to be having a lot of worries.
‘What is preying on your mind?’ she asked him.
He gave a dry smile.
‘No, it is not what you think,’ he assured her. ‘I know that you are excited about your trip. I have got used to it. My disciples Nandi and Bhringi will keep me company as always.’
‘And – you will go high on the weeds,’ Durga said.
‘That is my way to maintain my balance,’ Shiva grinned.
‘Then what is biting you?’
‘It is that auto hub that finally did not happen,’ Shiva sighed. ‘The court has given its decision and the farmers will get back their land.’

‘They are happy,’ Durga said. ‘They are farmers and love the soil. They want to grow their crops and are not interested in making automobiles.’
‘Actually, they are a divided lot,’ Shiva murmured. ‘One group wants it. Another group does not want it. And, the leaders are laying a dangerous game.’
‘I saw in the TV news just now - a group of people have gone to Germany. They want to bring home German automobiles. But – where will they give them land?’
‘German cars are really small,’ Durga explained. ‘They do not need too much land. Moreover, they can go in for three or four tier manufacture. That way, the need for land will reduce. And, I believe, one section of farmers actually want an auto hub in the same plot of land.’
‘But – I saw bulldozers tearing up the roads and mowing down the grass.’
‘That is how change takes place. Keep the main idea intact and add frills so that there is happiness all around.’ ‘You mean it’s a game?’
‘Yes. They will rebuild them,’ Durga said. ‘I know. The syndicate is ready to take over when the bulldozers call it a day. The leaders play to the gallery. They repackage old wine in a new bottle. Everyone does it.’ (to be continued …)


Image courtesy wikimediacommons.org


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Didi’s naughty boys tie her up in knots (satire)

Didi had to do a lot of cleanup of her house to put it in order because her naughty boys had tied her in knots. It was in a bad condition and she was frantically searching for the proper broom or should she go in for vacuum cleaners? She therefore called up Moo Cool, her favorite assistant who doubled up as her Man Friday.
‘I want brooms,’ she said.
‘Should I get in touch with Cage Reeball in Delhi?’ Moo Cool asked. ‘He is the only leader with brooms, a broom master.’
‘No, I want brooms to clean up a whole lot of mess in my house. I don’t want any tie up with the broom party of Delhi. Not at the moment, that is.’
‘Oh, you mean local dirt?’
‘Yes, the naughty boys are raising a stink. And are spoiling the beauty of my garden.’

‘You have to handle them with care,’ Moo Cool said.‘They have been our assets.’
‘Today, they have become liabilities. I agree that syndicates are useful because they are a source of income for many,’ Didi said. ‘They work in groups and reduce the unemployment issue.’
‘Yes, they pool their efforts to help house construction business,’ Moo Cool added. ‘The problem happens when some of them become adventurous, become greedy and fall victim to easy money by virtue of links with us.’
‘They are the naughty boys,’ Didi said. ‘Why don’t you scold them? You are like their big brother and have every right to punish them.’
‘I’ll do that,’ Moo Cool said. ‘Shall I ask the hospitals to keep ready some more VIP cabins?’ Moo Cool asked.
‘Yes, you can do that,’ Didi replied. ‘Once in police custody, they’ll all be complaining of chest pain and breathlessness. So, they can be in the ICUs’.
‘And – shall I get the cabins furnished with AC, TV and sofa sets?’
‘But of course,’ Didi said. ‘They cannot be put in solitary confinement. They’ll need to relax. By the way - ask Dee Wreck to paint a rosy picture of all this in the social media. That counts a lot today and is a surefire method to wipe out the bad picture and paint a new one.’ (to be continued …)


Image courtesy wikimediacommons.org

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