Lord Shiva and the sight of potbellied policemen (satire)

Lord Shiva was in one of his jolly moods when he allowed himself a good laugh. It was not a normal sight because he has plenty on his mind – but, still, on some occasions he does laugh.
That is what brought Durga out of her kitchen. She was preparing aloo paratha when she heard Shiva’s loud laughter. ‘What is so funny?’ she asked as she came up beside her Lord.
‘Those policemen,’ Shiva said and held out the binocular to her.
Durga took it, focused it and grinned.
‘Poor souls,’ she sighed, ‘they are really struggling to keep their belts in place. Wonder how they manage to move about. Can they ever expect to chase and catch a thief with a figure like that?’
‘Don’t blame them,’ Shiva said. ‘A well-developed belly means a satisfied individual. He can digest his food, has a good night’s sleep and does not have a care in the world.’

‘You mean he has the world in his pocket?’ Durga asked.
‘Sort of,’ Shiva said. ‘Their minister is none other than Didi. She takes good care of her police force. She has subcontracted most of the policing work to her own people. And, the regular police take it easy. They just come, sleep and go.’
‘But – the police chief is so slim,’ Durga pointed out. ‘He has set an example, his force should follow suit.’
‘My dear, there is many a slip between the cup and the lip. And, in case you have not seen, the police in Mumbai are also wide at the middle. And, policemen we see in films follow the trend. The audience make fun of them, they are at the butt of jokes. But, nothing happens.’
‘You mean we can never see slim and smart policemen in our forces? You mean Britain and the US will get the better of us? Our police cannot compete with Scotland Yard and FBI?’
‘Don’t lose heart,’ Shiva mumbled. ‘Weight is no problem – in fact it opens up new opportunities.’
‘What do you mean?’
‘You can have new gyms, new equipment like treadmills, new weight reduction programs on TV, new weight reduction pills. And, people can mint money on the sly.’ (to be contd …)


Image courtesy wikimediacommons.org

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