Moody and the half pant brigade (satire)

Moody was staring at a black and white snapshot of himself as a young man selling chai - he wore shorts in those days and felt comfortable in them. Such attires allowed a lot of freedom in movement and, when the air got hot and stifling, especially in the summer months, these half pants were indispensable.
And, all of a sudden, the decision came from above that half pants will make way for full pants.

Suddenly his hot line rang – it was Bee Rack O’Vama.
‘Hi man,’ he began, ‘how are your boundaries? Have you started to mend the fences?’
‘Mending fences is a continuous process,’ Moody replied.
‘I know,’ Bee Rack sighed. ‘I have Vladdy Putty in my hair. He is unpredictable – just like your Naa Buzz. And – I just cannot wish him away. Anyway – let us talk on something more interesting.’
‘Like Diwali?’
‘Yes. I celebrated it in my office. It shows how close we are, doesn’t it?’
‘Yes.’
‘Then why don’t you revolt?’
‘Why should I?’
‘Because your bosses are insisting that you wear full pants when I know that you love half pants.’
Moody gave a dry laugh.
‘It is not easy,’ he said. ‘Half pants were OK so long as we remained in the background. But – with the global recognition that we are getting, we have to change tracks.’
‘Hey,’ O’Vama laughed. ‘Half pants look so cute. Bermuda shorts are a craze even in your country. City folks in cars go about in bermudas and capris. Then why did you switch over to long ones?’
‘It is a decision that I cannot question or overrule,’ Moody mumbled.
‘I believe it has got something to do with promoting khadi,’ Bee Rack said. ‘Anyway – hope your better half will return soon from her pilgrimage. My wife wanted to meet her.’
‘That will have to wait,’ Moody said. ‘She lives in her world, I live in mine.’ (to be continued …)


Image courtesy wikimediacommons.org


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Half pant brigade to participate on R-Day (satire)

#rday #makeinindia #halfpant #yoga Another R-day was looming large on the horizon and Moody was wary because his chief guest might find it difficult to have a clear vison of the impressive scenes that would unfold before his eyes. The problem was the fog and poor visibility.
‘How best can we overcome the problem?’ he asked Sue Sharma who was seated with him in his chamber along with Jet Lee and Hash Budden.
‘An exercise of odd-even had managed to reduce the problem,’ Hash Budden said. ‘But – that should not be a major problem because the tableaus would move at a snail’s pace.’
‘We could give him binoculars,’ Sue suggested. ‘That way he need not strain his eyes.’
‘And – the half pant brigade will be an added attraction,’ Moody said. ‘I want to popularize it.’

‘I know, ’Sue Sharma said. ‘There has been criticism from some quarters on this issue.’
‘I am not bothered about that. If people can go around in bermudas and hot pants, then why can’t some of them go around in half pants?’
‘You do have a point there,’ Sue agreed.
‘Moreover the half pant team would twirl their sticks and demonstrate how effective a weapon it can be. It will be a golden tribute to our Make in India concept.’
Jet Lee nodded his approval.
‘I want to take him to Varanasi also,’ Moody said. ‘I want to show him around my dream city that is coming up like its Japanese counterpart. I thought of taking him on our new train. It looks just like a foreign train.’
‘It’ll be a long journey,’ Jet Lee said.
‘Jut an overnight journey,’ Moody brushed off the remarks. ‘It will bring us closer. We can lay the groundwork for some important deals.’
‘That is right,’ Hash Budden sounded serious. ‘What deals do you have in mind?’
‘We have exported the yoga – now it is the turn of the half pant and stick,’ Moody said and reached for a dhokla. ‘I am sure once my guest sees the power of the stick that the half pant brigade can wield, he will take home the idea and introduce it in his country. It will save him money on security.’
The others also reached for their dhoklas – this had become a routine, dhokla on a regular basis along with tea minus sugar and milk. Either dhokla or gathia. They longed for snacks like samosa with tea made of a liberal dose of milk and sugar which gives extra energy. But – they had got used to these changes. (to be continued …)

Image courtesy wikimediacommons.org

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